Ever since I've had this urge/addiction to download nostalgic music, my sister asks me to lower the volume of the speakers or I use earphones instead when I sit in front of the computer and do what ever I'm supposed to do. She doesn't really like the type of music I listen to nowadays...especially when she keeps hearing one track over and over again.

"Potek. Total Eclipse of the Heart na naman!"

Then that's when I became aware that I've been repeating the same song for over five times in an hour. Even my little brother, who's just in grade 6, memorized the frickin' song because of it. All I knew was I was just plain listening. It was in my playlist, so I was playing it. I really wasn't aware that I've been repeating it too much, too much for the comfort of the people around me. It was maybe because the things that came to my mind while I was listening to Bonnie Tyler scratch her throat out was different every time. It almost seems like I'm watching a movie in my head every time a note from the song strikes my eardrums.

Listening to the song purges a wides set of emotions from me. It relives the good that I have committed to my memory. Sometimes, the memories are too good that I end up screaming with Bonnie Tyler and I smile like a maniac whenever the good parts of the song crack up my speakers (..."together we can take it to the end of the line...I really need you tonight..forever's gonna start toniiiiggghhhtttt....forever's gonna start tooooniiiiggggghhhhhtttttttt!").

But of course, there are times that the purging hurts, pretty much like how you vomit when you're carsick. It hurts inside---in your stomach, your chest---as you feel the acidic mass rise to your throat. And finally, when you bring it all out, you wish you just held it all in. It's a sore to the senses. But in the back of your head, you thank all the deities that the puke's all gone. The burning sensation's all out of your body.

There has to be pain in every purging.

And somehow, though it hurts, I thank Bonnie Tyler for making me puke the burning stuff from my head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Katharis.
Purification through the purging of pity and fear.
Lit 14. Oh yeah.